Beef Up Your Dating Profile With These 9+ Tips (SFW)

Online dating. Everyone’s doing it. Real life is out, digital life is in. Safe and easy to make all those personality flaws fade away, right? But in an ocean of online dating profiles, pictures and descriptions, how do you make yours stand out?

I’m the editor for FoxyPop and I’ve been in a relationship with a woman I met on OKCupid for six months now. And this is hardly the first successful online relationship I’ve been in. I’ve mastered making that perfect connection over the internet, and now, I’m going to teach you how I’ve met the most fabulous women in my life. Breaking the ice, making the connection, bridging the gap from text to life, and finally, transitioning to a comfortable space in meatspace.

You know how to get laid. It’s fucking easy to get laid. But making a meaningful connection…

This is FoxyPop’s first article on beefing up your dating profile, and the first thing we’re going to discuss is the number one way to get noticed on a dating site!

Your Profile Picture!

There’s no way around it, the first thing anyone sees on your profile is your picture, the star of the show. A great profile picture is comprised of these these things.

  1. You’re the star of the show! Don’t post pictures of you with your ex, your family, your kids, your friends. Find a great picture that showcases you! The exception is, of course, adorable pets. Please, by all means, feature the cutest of cats in your company!

    dating profile picture woman with big cat sexy sleeves

    The cutest of cats??

  2. If you’re not in it just for the vajayjay, don’t make your first picture a sexy photo. Keep your shirt on, your boobs fluffed but covered. If your face is visible (and it should be!), smile, pout, look mysterious… be expressive!
  3. Chances are, even if you think you’re going to be compromised by having your face on the internet… you won’t be. Look, just tuck the weird fetishes away where they can’t be seen by the public and remember: it’s not a shame to look for a partner.
  4. Leave the filters to your Instagram! My first dating profile picture was a highly filtered selfie. Huge mistake! Can’t see you through all the blur!

    Almost perfect dating profile picture with cat

    This is a great storytelling picture for your cat’s dating profile…

Keeping Your Pic Read

5: Make it real! Everyone snaps a selfie in the bathroom. It’s better to go out, do something you love, and get a friend to grab that pic for you. My photo? Goofily flexing in the park. Maybe yours will be with a fish you caught, dressed up for a convention, cheering on your favorite sports team, or in the library with an armload of books. Your photo can tell a story in 5 seconds. Take every advantage of this first impression opportunity. Stick that ego that says, “I’m not pretty enough” off to the side, because that’s up to your significant other of the future to decide.

While you don’t have to be a great photographer to have a heart-stealing profile picture, use these quick photography tips to optimize your photograph (and you!) for success!

6: Natural light is always the best! Steer clear of harsh fluorescent lighting. No one ever looks good underneath that! If you’re taking shots indoors, a safe option is to have soft lighting coming towards you from the front, and from a top-angle. Diffuse harsh interior light with a white sheet off-screen.

good dating profile picture man with cat

A great example of a winning profile picture. Action, a backdrop that leads the eye to your sparkling and memorable smile, an adorable pet, soft natural light, sexy arms. I’d click that!

7: People skim through thumbnails, so a full-body picture is not the best choice for your cover picture. Select a waist-up photograph that still showcases some of your body, but focuses more clearly on your face. While you should still have a full body picture, if possible, don’t set it as your avatar. You will appear less distinct in a group of thumbnails.

 

Advanced Dating Profile Photography Tips

A few tips on how to knock your dating profile picture out of the water and blast it off to space!

8: Most photographers have heard of the rule of thirds. English-reading viewers will read your photo left-to-right. What that means for you is, there’s one “perfect” focal point in your photograph, where an English-reading viewer’s eyes will automatically go straight away.

foxyfocuspoint

bad dating profile picture

Heart-stealing dating profile? Not a chance.

9: Keep in mind the background. Don’t ruin a photo op with a toilet, misplaced toddler, or half empty takeout container. Look your best by tidying up before snapping that picture, and keep in mind a simple cinematographic trick: any lines in the background should lead the viewer straight to what you want them to look at–your eyes, your breasts, your guns. Compose wisely when picking an angle and what to stand in front of. You have the power to guide your viewer’s eyes wherever you’d like. You don’t want to guide them off-screen and straight to some other jerk!

Sketch leading eye through composition of dating profile picture from smile to cleavage shot.

Do you want to lead the viewer’s eye to your smile, or to your cleavage?

 

Still Reading? Here are a few more thoughts on your dating profile and making that first impression…

Here are a few more tips as a reward for making it through the main article!

Your tagline is your second lightening fast opportunity to make an impression. Because, in wham-bam internet time, people spend maybe a couple seconds skimming. If they click, probably you caught their eye. Make that first second a hook rather than a sinker.

Don’t lose that with a first liner warning about universities stealing your information to use for research projects. I see this on Fetlife all the time.

Finally, don’t be afraid of paid and niche targeted dating sites. This will weed out the bottom feeders. Anyone can make an account for free on Plenty of Fish. By picking a specific niche dating site, like this BDSM focused dating site, you will guarantee a potential audience of people already into the same thing as you. At first, I ignored ads for these kinds of sites, thinking them useless in my quest to find a great partner. But later on in my digital journey to make a great connection, I started signing up for sites besides the mainstream options, and found that much to my surprise, while there were far less options to look through, the people on these sites were far more often closer to what I wanted in a partner.

If you feel shamed for having a preference, don’t! If it’s your thing, there’s no shame in checking out a dating site for cheaters or a site for only over 40 year old daters. The reason these sites pepper the internet with ads is because they focus on people like you, with a specific fetish or desire you’d like to address. While I did get lucky on OKCupid, weeding through the literal hundreds of options near me by reading through a zillion question and answer options to try find someone who matched my fetishes. If you have the money to spend on a paid membership, it will weed out the bottom feeders.

What do you like to see in a dating profile site picture? Let me know in the comments below!

August 24, 2016

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